Sunday, November 6, 2011

The Healing Has Begun. You have NOT Won...

It's true.  That night, what happened to me... 
I can't forget it so easily.  This is another one of my poems
Free verse this time.  Just another tidbit to help you see how I view things.
-W.R. Berry

You smile, living life without any care in the world.
How could you, when you’ve done something like this?
How can you even begin to act as though it never existed?
I have to remember every single day what happened.
You rape my memory, just like you raped me that night.
Had you planned this? Had you just acted out your lust?

It feels as though time never heals.
But you, you will never see me shed my tears
As those tears fall from my aquamarine blue eyes

You will not even begin to see that happen.

Of course you don’t care- you never did.

Who gave you fucking permission?

Who gave you the right to violate me?

To smile, no matter how much I begged you to stop

And be satisfied?

I’m not the one fucked up. 

No no.  Sweetie, that is you.

This is all of your fault.

When I say “I’m fine” to people

I am completely full of shit.

But they believe me anyway

Except those who know the truth.

They know just who you are.

I put up this wall for a reason.

I am NOT going to let you knock it down!

Damn it, I have worked hard to maintain my sanity.

Every damn day is a battle with myself.

A battle to stay positive.

Toss out the bad, and bring in the good.

Hit a punching bag with all of my power.

Say “FUCK YOU!” over and over again to the mirror.

You will not see the tears I cry.

No.  Not until, and if this makes it to trial.

If it does, you’re going to be sorry as hell.

If it doesn’t, I still won’t let you win.
You see, you fucking scumbag

You lose, either way.

You are fucked, either way.

And I pray with every ounce of my being

That the next woman you harm reports your ass.

It won’t be likely…. you just have a way of manipulation.

“This won’t happen again.”

No fucking shit, you no good sherlock!

If you come anywhere NEAR me

With your intention of fear and pain

I WILL, repeat WILL kick your ass.

Buster, you’d better be scared.

I will sure as hell break in my gloves.

I am a woman ready for battle.

You can no longer hurt me ever again.

I am a survivor of rape.

And I will NOT be silenced. 

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