God Bless America.... I'm going to go fucking insane!
This is the WORST.
Yes- you heard me.
Dad has been going WAY downhill since Saturday...
He's been coughing up blood, too weak to move by himself without my mom or I's guidance... ugh. (*Screams every profanity I can think of*)!!!!!!!!!!!!
God! It's not fair. He has been talking about understanding what the doctors meant by just wanting to give up... he's wanting to give up. Not this second... but soon. It's "the beginning of the end." I can't frickin' handle it... I really can't. The anti-depressants won't touch me... Nothing will at this point. It's to the point where I'm broken, and nothing can mend me. I feel sick... nauseous... mad... scared... hurt and confused.
The pit of my stomach hurts! It's hollow.... and I feel like I can't breathe. That's why I can't cry.... even though I want to so badly- I already have a bit this morning.
I don't want it to be the end..... PLEASE don't be the end.
I know it's been three months already... but please, God... don't let it be over- not yet.
-WRB
This Blog is to currently inform all of you followers about my life currently, after the loss of my amazing Dad, Bear. Personal and spiritual, happy and sad. Good and bad. It's my blog, and a side of my Aspieness that most don't get to experience- unless they truly know me. Well- through this, you'll get to know me. For who I truly am. The Aspie Girl.
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